If you’re not a fan of a particular fantasy TV show based on a
series of bestselling political-fantasy-epic novels then you may be
unaware of the most recent controversy coming out of ‘Game of
Thrones’-land at the moment. GoT, as we fans endearingly/lazily
shorthand it, has never been one to shy away from controversial
things; it’s not exactly a Disney series after all and, much like
the books it is (now somewhat loosely) based on, the show has among
other things killed often-beloved characters in a variety of nasty
and gruesomely-effective ways; depicted both incest and torture
remarkably graphically; and just generally spattered boobs and blood
all over the screen, as HBO shows are wont to generally do (remember
the Sopranos? Oy…)
This past week, however, GoT has surpassed itself, in an act so
horrifying that even Tony Soprano would say “now steady on, chaps;
this has all gone a bit far, hasn’t it?” (Or words to that
effect). For those out of the loop, a brief synopsis: two of the
characters in Game of Thrones are Jaime and Cersei Lannister, twins
who have an unusually close relationship with each other. And by
“close” I mean “incestuous”, since Jaime has fathered all
three of Cersei’s children while the rest of the world generally
assumed the father was her late husband King Robert Baratheon. All
the in’s and out’s of what has happened up to this point are not
really relevant (and would take far too long to go into), but the
basic things you need to know are this: Cersei is power-hungry and
resents the fact that, as a woman, she can’t do half the things a
man can do, (like rule a kingdom in her own right), but she does love
her children which redeems her slightly; and Jaime was the best
swordsman in the Seven Kingdoms, but has recently lost his sword hand
after being captured by their enemies (there was a war going on.
It’s complicated). As a result, Cersei is totally repulsed by her
brother/lover’s sudden ‘deformity’ and has generally been a bit
of a bitch to him since he got back. I DID tell you it wasn’t
Disney…
On Sunday night’s episode of the show, however, after the sudden
demise-by-poisoning of their eldest son (spoilt evil shit King
Joffrey, who was mourned by precisely no one in the fandom
whatsoever), things moved beyond the “oh, it’s just GoT, what did
you expect?”- way of thinking. While Cersei is in the sept
(church) mourning her dead son who is lying in state, Jaime rapes
her. Cue uproar. Now this differs from the scene in the actual
book; whereas in the show Jaime has been back home for a while and
Cersei has been a Grade-A bitch about his hand, insisting he
“repulses” her and not letting him touch her, in the book the
first time she sees him is when he rocks up at the sept and,
regardless of the “morality” of shagging her brother, is swept up
by the fact he’s come back home to her. She does hesitate
to begin with, but only because she’s afraid they’ll be caught;
as he kisses her she protests about getting caught but then
explicitly consents to the sexual act. In fact her exact words are,
“hurry; quickly, quickly, now, do it now, do me now.” I mean
yeah ok it’s still incest and therefore all kinds of ick, but at
least it’s, y’know, consensual incest. (And there’s a sentence
I never thought I’d write…) So yeah. Cue uproar.
Cue even more uproar, however, when the director Alex Graves, in
response to said uproar, made a statement which said that the scene
“becomes consensual by the end, because anything for them
ultimately results in a turn-on, especially a power struggle.”
This is apparently clarified by the fact she kisses him back and
wraps her legs around him. HOWEVER. In another interview Graves
refers to the entire thing as “forced sex”; one of the directors,
David Benioff, then chimes in with the statement, “It becomes a
really kind of horrifying scene, because you see, obviously,
Joffrey’s body right there, and you see that Cersei is resisting
this. She’s saying no, and he’s forcing himself on her. So it was
a really uncomfortable scene, and a tricky scene to shoot.”
Watching the scene this becomes entirely apparent by the fact Cersei
says “no” and “stop” a whole lot and Jaime carries on
regardless; at one point she says “it’s not right”, to which he
responds “I don’t care”.
But here’s the thing. “Forcing himself on her” and “forced
sex” are synonyms for rape. There’s no if’s or but’s or
maybe’s about it: she said no, he carried on, that equals rape.
And herein lies the inherent problem.
For me personally, it’s not about the changes to the book this time
(and this is the second time a sex scene in the books has been
“dramatised” as a rape; what was a surprisingly tender moment
between Daenerys and Khal Drogo in the books was also turned into a
brutal rape in the TV show back in series one); it’s about the
minimising of the rape. I mean I don’t agree with it, even in
light of the changes made to the plot, but it wouldn’t be the first
time rape has been used as a plot driver in a fictional story. It’s
not my personal cup of tea but then again neither’s dismembering
corpses, yet crime fiction is one of the consistent best-selling
genres of fiction. Plus rape, y’know, HAPPENS, which means that
people making TV dramas or writing books are going to use it as a way
of moving the plot along, whether it’s a police procedural or a
gritty revenge drama. So. Bad stuff happens and fiction writers
write about it. It happens. What HAS pissed me off, however, has
been the minimising done by those connected with the show and some of
the comments I’ve seen from men about rape in the debates which
have spawned from this incident.
It seems utterly ridiculous to me that in the 21st century
we still have to point this out to people, but apparently there are
some who just don’t get it. Rape is rape is rape. There are no
“grey areas”, no “shades”, no “yes-and-no” about it;
there is only rape. If someone says “no, I don’t want you
putting that tongue/finger/penis/sex toy/bottle/whatever inside my
person, thank you very much,” and you go right ahead and do it
anyway, guess what? You’re a rapist. It
doesn't matter if we're drunk, sober, virgins, prostitutes, walking
home alone at 3am, in a cab, wearing red knickers or wearing a burka
- NO MEANS NO. And that applies whether it's a stranger, fuck buddy
or your long-term partner: if someone says "no” to sex –
even if they've let you do it before and even if they said yes and
then changed their minds and said no – and you carry on regardless
YOU HAVE COMMITTED RAPE!!! The law is unequivocal on this; and I
quote:
A person is deemed to have committed an offence if -
a) he intentionally penetrates the vagina, anus or mouth of another
person (B) with his penis;
b) B does not consent to the penetration; and
c) A does not reasonably believe that B consents.”
(Sexual Offences Act 2003)
There is also an offence of “assault by penetration” which is
similar except it relates to penetration of the vagina or anus “by
a part of his body or anything else”.
Now anyone who thinks that a woman saying “no” and “stop”
constitutes anything other than non-consent is at best deluded and at
worst a danger. I'm GLAD the scene was “hard to film”; so it
bloody should be!! Anyone having shits and giggles over filming a
rape scene wants their head examined; to then minimise the scene –
to imply that it's all ok because she “gave in” in the end and
everything between them is a “turn on” - is hugely irresponsible
and incredibly disrespectful to anyone who has ever been a
victim/survivor of rape. It is, however, yet another reminder of the
systemic and endemic misogyny and sexual objectification of women
which is so prevalent in our society. We live in a world where
violent porn is accessed by kids and seen as “normal sex”, for
god's sake. I don't need a UN Special Envoy to tell me how sexist
Britain is; I live it. We live in a society where rape is both a
punchline (ha ha, how hilarious) and the most brutal outcome of the
opposite end of that spectrum; where sexual violence has become so
normalised that teenage girls don't know they've been victims of rape
or sexual assault “because he's my boyfriend/in my maths
class/everyone else did it”. That's beyond abhorrent. We need to
be dismantling these myths, tearing down the layers of bullshit which
surround this issue so that the next generation realises that it's
wrong. We need strong, brilliant women to teach their
daughters/younger sisters/nieces to sit up and say “oy, misogyny,
bog off and leave us alone!” and we need strong, brilliant men to
sit their sons/younger brothers/nephews down and tell them that when
a girls says no she means no; when she says yes and then changes her
mind and says no she means no; that if she says yes because you
pressured her into it then she hasn't really said yes. We need to
stop victim blaming;
the whole "oh, she was drunk/led me on/was wearing red
knickers/walked home by herself/said yes to start with etc etc"
thing is just horrendous. Rape is always the fault of the rapist,
NEVER the victim; and on the issue of consent if a person is *that*
drunk then they CANNOT give informed consent and so it is STILL
rape!!! Similarly if you go to bed with your wife/girlfriend/woman
you picked up in a club and she suddenly turns round and says “no,
I changed my mind, I don't want to sleep with you” but you ignore
that...ta-dah! Rapist. It doesn't matter that you've been married
twenty years, or that she kissed you in the club, or that she let you
sleep with her last week – once she says “no” and you don't
stop, you've committed an illegal act.
The
complete bullshit spouted by the GoT team on this issue has just
added another layer of normalisation – nay, even glamorisation –
of the entire issue of rape and sexual violence in our society and I
for one am getting heartily sick of it. To put it in simple terms,
it's like the NSPCC campaign to teach children the Underwear Rule: MY
body, MY rules, and if I say stop you bloody well stop. Otherwise
it's rape. End of. Simple as. There is no 'technical' rape or “shade”
of rape or “degree” of rape or any other bullshit definition;
there is only rape.. The fact we still have to point this out to
people just goes to show how depressingly far there is to go...
